As i type this i am sorta quaking in my boots.... i am trapped inside of my room as i hear the loafy screams of domas loaf outside of my room trying to get in.... i don't have long so i might as well try to sorta tell everyone how i got into this situation.....

It all started today.... i got out of bed and immediately went onto the Bopimo!™ website to play the sorta hot new domas loaf adventure level as i always do every morning.... today was the day domas loaf adventure 58 🪂 came out....
The level was awesome as per usual... once i got to the bottom of the sorta awesome falling level i collected the star and got #8 on the level.... but then i noticed something outside of the level.... it was a barely visible portal right outside the ending area with the handsome domas loaf and his faithful compatriote completion loaf....... i thought, word for word:
"gee willikers maybe this portal sorta brings me to more awesome domas loaf content..... i should definitely go into it"

how wrong i was...........

Switching to 1.0.18's april fools version, god's most blessed version (it's domas loaf themed), i was able to kimo clip through the wall and dive into the portal only to be brought onto a platform with a level painting that had a pitch black thumbnail..... there was a block with a nametag above it saying "Enter for sorta fun.................... ; )"
The nametag block struck me as odd because who the hell spaces out an emoticon's eyes and mouth.... i immediately knew that i was getting into something that i shouldn't and moved my mouse to the X button on the Bopimo!™ window.... but i wanted to see what sorta funny content i would find in the level the painting would bring me to..... so i jumped in....
My Bopimo!™ client then closed and instead of a new window appearing, the launcher opened.... it started updating the client which took several hours and as soon as it was ready i was sent into the level.....
My Bopimo!™ client looked different...... opening the F3 menu brought my game to 1 FPS but i could see the version number...... it was 6.6.6..... i remember in complete detail, word by word, thinking to myself: "oh gee firecat's been busy i see................ anything to not release 1.2 i guess.............. skipping over it entirely................."
Turning the F3 menu off and bothering to actually look at the level i noticed that it was sorta weird..... it was sorta pitch black with no discernable shapes....... the skybox was also black........ my bopi though sorta weirdly enough was completely lit up........... as if you turn mat_fullbright on in a game on hit video game engine the Source™ engine by VALVe® Software....... i also noticed that the window title was now "Bopimo! - domas loaf adventure 666" which was sorta scary......
Walking around i discovered several oddities.................. i found completion loaf but it didn't say "im completion loaf" it said "im NOT completion loaf" which was so scary i ran away...... then i sorta found domas loaf...... or what was left of him......
domas loaf had been turned into a sorta cruel mockery of what he once was..... his loaf body had been mangled and sorta resembled a crazy straw......... his head had been flattened into the shape of Chips Ahoy!™ Original Chocolate Chip Cookies now at local retailers for $3.46.... worst of all his face was sorta replaced by a single unblinking spooky eye...... i thought this was sorta scary so i started using speedrunner tech to get away as fast as possible.......... but then it started chasing me........
Running away i sorta discovered several pieces of old domas loaf adventures...... grandpa loaf's grave..... the blurry eiffel tower..... this must be where sorta old adventures go to die..... after they have served their purpose as a daily clear to the bopimo populace they are thrown into the void evermore.....
Then i came across the scariest site of them all..... the original DOMAS LOAF!!!!!!!!! level from 03/22/2025..... except domas loaf was sorta missing.... realisation then sorta struck me......... the domas loaf that was chasing me must've been the original one..... from the lore-less first level.... back when completion loaf didn't even exist.............. and he couldn't speak........ this must be his final resting place and now he's sorta angry............
Not long after, the mangled original domas loaf caught up with me..... the frame it touched me my game closed and my computer sorta blue-screened..... i thought: "oh damn well uhhhhhhhhh i guess i'll turn it back on" but when i did i was greeted with my desktop........ every file on it had been removed, but the recycling bin remained and it sorta had stuff in it........... opening it revealed all of my domas loaf fancams and domas loaf ship art and fanfiction had been placed into the recycling bin..... i was sorta livid.... how could the original domas loaf do this..........

I then noticed that there was another file on my desktop..... "open.txt"..... inside was my full legal name, woke pronouns, gender, current marital status, current occupation and place of work, ip address, router details, favourite food, favourite video games, sorta best friends & family members (and their respective doxxes) and much more incredibly revealing details..........
I then heard a knock at my front door....... i thought about investigating but decided not to move from my room...... i then heard the door being smashed down and i knew that i was gonna die......... i sorta quickly barricaded my room's door with all of my furniture and my domas loaf merch and memorabilia.... i started hearing heavy footsteps breaking the steps of my sorta grand staircase as they were walking up (i live in a mansion with 60 rooms and a foyer with a huge staircase btw)....... then sorta pounding on my door.......

I am currently sorta holed up in my room......... i am hugging my domas loaf body pillow tight with one arm as i clutch my official domas loaf branded swiss army knife in my other hand...... i sorta don't know if i'll come out of this alive......... if you're hearing this god (domas loaf), please help me............

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domas loaf ship art?

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i still remember when it was pinned

Im scared 😭😭😭